Survival Of A Psychopath(With Borderline Tendencies…Post Traumatic Stress Disorder…)

Do others around us really understand what we are going through at the hands of the psychopath in our lives? Can they truly see or understand what is happening to us? For some of us, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is the greatest tragedy that besets our minds. For others, it is not. No one can predict the outcome of a relationship with a psychopath. No one can fully understand the dynamics of the people involved. Only people touched by the evil are forever harmed internally, whether they will admit this to themselves, or to each other.

Each person walks away, seemingly unscathed, except for the victim. The victim always remains the one that will be the person that holds the pain. There is much more to the story, however. People remember days, events, moments. And those memories remain etched in minds. Beyond that, too, the pain that has become Post Traumatic Stress Disorder now becomes a burden on the people who are close to the victim.

I use the word burden with caution. I use it carefully. Told something recently, I was quite startled by the comment. A person close to me thought that I had “overcome the stresses of PTSD.” They thought I was really doing well. Hmmm. Interesting concept. “Really doing well”. Those that do not have PTSD do not fully understand the depths of the disorder. Nor do they understand what those afflicted with it will do to either overcome it or try to hide it.

I don’t always talk about it. What I do like is that I am a Survivor. That’s the key. If I wasn’t a Survivor, then this post would be moot. Although I can call myself one, others may not see that in me. Only I can. Only I can see what I have overcome, and what I may never be able to get through. Only I know what triggers my thoughts. Because I am the only person that was where the traumas occurred.

So all this weight falls on me. And all this weight falls on anyone that chooses to be close to me. It can and will bring them down if they allow it. So in reality, many will step away. Some will choose to walk immediately. Some will stay and hear for a bit, then put their shoes on to step. Others will hang out and then put those running shoes on and never come back. But a select few will stay. I applaud them and love them dearly.

It’s not a physical neediness that people with PTSD desire. Nor is it a mental neediness. I believe it’s more of an understanding of their independent desire than anything else. We need our space. We need our understanding. We need our windows to look out and not asked “why” all the time. We need our space, but we want you in our space, too. If that doesn’t make sense, then we want you to ask us to explain it to you. We don’t want you to explain it to us. We want to explain it to you, so you understand what we are feeling, not what you are feeling. Then you can understand us. And if it’s too much for you to bear…to handle? That’s ok by us. Go ahead and walk or run. We’re still here. We don’t need anyone around us that can’t deal with someone who has been scarred for life. Someone that has been scarred and lived through it and still wants to live.

Are we optimists by seeing the scar above the wound? Or pessimists by seeing the wound below the scar? Neither, I feel. Perhaps we break even in life. Actually, that’s not too bad. Kind of like a new start. You’re not behind anything but not ahead. It’s like turning a new leaf over. Looking at life that way can give a person a new perspective that involves a lot of hope and give them much inspiration for their future. One can set goals. For themselves, not for others. That is what others need to understand. Because if the goals, the new future isn’t met on time, it’s not a big setback. It’s just another rock in the road. And compared to the boulders demolished before? It’s nothing. The future is what you decide it to be, not what others want it to be for you.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder can be caused by some type of emotional trauma to the psyche. It can also be caused by physical abuse. Physical abuse includes not only hitting, but also sexual abuse. Remember this, it is given to you. In a sense of words. You are not born with it. You are a recipient of PTSD because of traumas inflicted upon your normal mental state. That is probably the most important statement that I can ever tell someone. That doesn’t mean that PTSD goes away easily. At times in some people, it can stay chronic, depending upon the state of their traumas. For others, it can be resolved more easily.

Regardless of the issues that you have dealt with in dealing with psychopaths, etc., their pure evilness can leave some very nasty remains behind. Talking with others helps. There are more people out there than you would realize that have dealt with these types of people. Start talking with those that you trust. If you feel that you were the person that was “wrong”, read articles about the behaviors of these types of personalities. See how manipulative they are. How they turn conversations around to make you feel as if you have done damaging effects to a relationship. Learn all you can and better yourself. Because most importantly, you are better. Hopefully a better person than they are and a better person for leaving that relationship.

Eventually this understanding will come to you and peace will come to your soul. Not only to your self, but into your self. I do believe that anyone that desires to overcome their tragedies and traumas has a good chance at understanding what has happened to them. Understanding is a key to moving forward.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder


Post traumatic stress disorder is classified as an anxiety disorder, characterized by aversive anxiety-related experiences, behaviors, and physiological responses that develop after exposure to a psychologically traumatic event (sometimes months after). Its features persist for longer than 30 days, which distinguishes it from the briefer acute stress disorder. These persisting posttraumatic stress symptoms cause significant disruptions of one or more important areas of life function.[4] It has three sub-forms: acute, chronic, and delayed-onset.


Psychological trauma

PTSD is believed to be caused by either physical trauma or psychological trauma, or more frequently a combination of both.[1] According to Atkinson et al. (2000)[citation needed] PTSD is more likely to be caused by physical or psychological trauma caused by humans such as rape, war, or terrorist attack than trauma caused by natural disasters. Possible sources of trauma include experiencing or witnessing childhood or adult physicalemotional or sexual abuse.[1] In addition, experiencing or witnessing an event perceived as life-threatening such as physical assault, adult experiences of sexual assault, accidents, drug addiction, illnesses, medical complications, or employment in occupations exposed to war (such as soldiers) or disaster (such as emergency serviceworkers).[6]

Traumatic events that may cause PTSD symptoms to develop include violent assault, kidnapping, sexual assault, torture, being a hostage, prisoner of war or concentration camp victim, experiencing a disaster, violent automobile accidents or getting a diagnosis of a life-threatening illness.[1] Children or adults may develop PTSD symptoms by experiencing bullying or mobbing.[7][8]Preliminary research suggests that child abuse may interact with mutations in a stress-related gene to increase the risk of PTSD in adults.[9][unreliable medical source?][10][unreliable medical source?][11]

Multiple studies show that parental PTSD and other posttraumatic disturbances in parental psychological functioning can, despite a traumatized parent’s best efforts, interfere with their response to their child as well as their child’s response to trauma.[unreliable medical source?][12][unreliable medical source?][13] Parents with violence-related PTSD may, for example, inadvertently expose their children to developmentally inappropriate violent media due to their need to manage their own emotional dysregulation.[unreliable medical source?][14] Clinical findings indicate that a failure to provide adequate treatment to children after they suffer a traumatic experience, depending on their vulnerability and the severity of the trauma, will ultimately lead to PTSD symptoms in adulthood.


PTSD symptoms may result when a traumatic event causes an overactive adrenaline response, which creates deep neurological patterns in the brain. These patterns can persist long after the event that triggered the fear, making an individual hyper-responsive to future fearful situations.[16][Full citation needed][unreliable source?]

PTSD displays biochemical changes in the brain and body that differ from other psychiatric disorders such as major depression. Individuals diagnosed with PTSD respond more strongly to adexamethasone suppression test than individuals diagnosed with clinical depression.[17][18]

In addition, most people with PTSD also show a low secretion of cortisol and high secretion of catecholamines in urine, with a norepinephrine/cortisol ratio consequently higher than comparable non-diagnosed individuals.[19] This is in contrast to the normative fight-or-flight response, in which both catecholamine and cortisol levels are elevated after exposure to a stressor.[20]

Brain catecholamine levels are low,[21] and corticotropin-releasing factor (CRF) concentrations are high.[22][23] Together, these findings suggest abnormality in the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis.

Given the strong cortisol suppression to dexamethasone in PTSD, HPA axis abnormalities are likely predicated on strong negative feedback inhibition of cortisol, itself likely due to an increased sensitivity of glucocorticoid receptors.[24] Some researchers have associated the response to stress in PTSD with long-term exposure to high levels of norepinephrine and low levels of cortisol, a pattern associated with improved learning in animals.[citation needed]

Translating this reaction to human conditions gives a pathophysiological explanation for PTSD by a maladaptive learning pathway to fear response through a hypersensitive, hyperreactive and hyperresponsive HPA axis.[25]

Low cortisol levels may predispose individuals to PTSD: Following war trauma, Swedish soldiers serving in Bosnia and Herzegovina with low pre-service salivary cortisol levels had a higher risk of reacting with PTSD symptoms, following war trauma, than soldiers with normal pre-service levels.[26] Because cortisol is normally important in restoring homeostasis after the stress response, it is thought that trauma survivors with low cortisol experience a poorly contained—that is, longer and more distressing—response, setting the stage for PTSD.

However, there is considerable controversy within the medical community regarding the neurobiology of PTSD. A review of existing studies on this subject showed no clear relationship between cortisol levels and PTSD. Only a slight majority have found a decrease in cortisol levels while others have found no effect or even an increase.[27]


Three areas of the brain whose function may be altered in PTSD have been identified: the prefrontal cortexamygdala and hippocampus. Much of this research has utilised PTSD victims from the Vietnam War. For example, a prospective study using the Vietnam Head Injury Study showed that damage to the prefrontal cortex may actually be protective against later development of PTSD.[29] In a study by Gurvits et al., combat veterans of the Vietnam Warwith PTSD showed a 20% reduction in the volume of their hippocampus compared with veterans who suffered no such symptoms.[30] This finding could not be replicated in chronic PTSD patients traumatized at an air show plane crash in 1988 (Ramstein, Germany).[31][32]

In human studies, the amygdala has been shown to be strongly involved in the formation of emotional memories, especially fear-related memories.Neuroimaging studies in humans have revealed both morphological and functional aspects of PTSD.[citation needed]

The amygdalocentric model of PTSD proposes that it is associated with hyperarousal of the amygdala and insufficient top-down control by the medialprefrontal cortex and the hippocampus particularly during extinction.[33] This is consistent with an interpretation of PTSD as a syndrome of deficientextinction ability.[33][34] Further animal and clinical research into the amygdala and fear conditioning may suggest additional treatments for the condition.


There is evidence that susceptibility to PTSD is hereditary. For twin pairs exposed to combat in Vietnam, having a monozygotic (identical) twin with PTSD was associated with an increased risk of the co-twin having PTSD compared to twins that were dizygotic (non-identical twins).[35]

Recently, it has been found that several single-nucleotide polymorphisms (SNPs) in FK506 binding protein 5 (FKBP5) interact with childhood trauma to predict severity of adult PTSD.[36][37] These findings suggest that individuals with these SNPs who are abused as children are more susceptible to PTSD as adults.

This is particularly interesting given that FKBP5 SNPs have previously been associated with peritraumatic dissociation (that is, dissociation at the time of the trauma),[38] which has itself been shown to be predictive of PTSD.[39][40] Furthermore, FKBP5 may be less expressed in those with current PTSD.[41] Another recent study found a single SNP in a putative estrogen response element on ADCYAP1R1 (encodes pituitary adenylate cyclase-activating polypeptide type I receptor or PAC1) to predict PTSD diagnosis and symptoms in females.[42] Incidentally, this SNP is also associated with fear discrimination. The study suggests that perturbations in the PACAP-PAC1 pathway are involved in abnormal stress responses underlying PTSD.

Risk Factors:

Although most people (50-90%) encounter trauma over a lifetime,[43][44] only about 8% develop full PTSD.[43] Vulnerability to PTSD presumably stems from an interaction of biological diathesis, early childhood developmental experiences, and trauma severity.[citation needed]

Predictor models have consistently found that childhood trauma, chronic adversity, and familial stressors increase risk for PTSD as well as risk for biological markers of risk for PTSD after a traumatic event in adulthood.[45][46][47][48] This effect of childhood trauma, which is not well understood, may be a marker for both traumatic experiences and attachment problems.[49][50] Proximity to, duration of, and severity of the trauma also make an impact; and interpersonal traumas cause more problems than impersonal ones.[51]

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2 responses to “Survival Of A Psychopath(With Borderline Tendencies…Post Traumatic Stress Disorder…)

  1. Pingback: Dealing with Fear: Walk; Don’t Run! – illustrated reflection « VARIEGATED VISION

  2. Pingback: Survivor Of A Psychopath…(with Borderline Tendencies) | Sorceressofthedark's Blog

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