Having had familial relationships with narcissists, I can honestly say they only miss what they can do to you. If you are lucky enough to distance yourself from them and the toxic relationship that they can cause for you, then they will miss the upheaval they will cause in your lives. If they don’t have anyone else to create havoc with, then yes, they will miss that havoc.
They will be at a loss for someone to mess with in their lives. They won’t miss you in the traditional “I love you” sense. They don’t feel love. I would swear ice flows through their veins.
They may concoct stories that they miss you to attempt to get you back, but it’s all a ruse. And should you fall for their ruse, you’ll be back in their toxic clutches again, wondering how it happened and how you can get out.
They may try to love-bomb you, surround your head with emotional promises and thoughts. They know what makes you tick.
Always be on the look-out. After I left, and we had begun to split the furniture, etc., I was living in another home. One day I arrived home early from work. I discovered one of my high school age children leaving my home with an expensive piece of artwork that I had inherited from my family.
I stopped her in her tracks and asked her what she thought she was doing removing an item that belonged to me from my home. She responded, “Dad misses the eagle painting and since you’re not really a fan of eagles, he told me to come and get it for him.” Always the Daddy’s Little Girl doing his bidding.
I took my painting that I treasured from my aunt out of her hands and explained to her that it belonged to me, not her father, and he had absolutely no right sending our daughter to my home to steal it. The painting was given to me and belonged in my family. Not to mention that what she was doing was illegal. She was stealing for another.
The man never spoke to me after I left him and he never initiates discussions with me now, even tho we are sometimes at family gatherings because of grandchildren. He spoke about me in smear campaigns, but that’s another post.
That was over 17 years ago. He missed that eagle painting more instead of the 25 year relationship of a marriage we had had. Instead of attempting to repair a marriage (I would not have) his interest was on physical objects. That’s common for narcissists. They don’t have emotions or empathy. They don’t feel. They want.
Again, ice veins cannot miss a human being with normal emotions but they certainly can miss and lust after the finer things in life that a person once supplied. They use you until you realize it or until they get tired of you and you are no longer of use to them.
Will a narc miss you when you leave them? No. Should you care? Absolutely not.
Lose them while you still have life and pride in yourself. Find yourself again, look up to the sky and tell yourself you are free. Tell yourself you are better than them. Tell yourself you will no longer participate in toxic relationships. You have your future to decide-what’s it going to be like?
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